Is Biglaw In For A Big Reckoning?

// Ed. note: This is the latest installment in a series of posts on motherhood in the legal profession, in partnership with our friends at MothersEsquire. Welcome Julie Bonasso to our pages. Click here if you’d like to donate to MothersEsquire.

What if it were possible to have a career where you moved seamlessly from work to life and back to work again, all while living in integrity with who you are? What would it be like to be fully engaged while at work, while being keenly present at home, all without worrying about the “hit” your career might take? If you had this life, how would your health, work, and relationships evolve?

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Unfortunately, at this current moment in time, our world does not support this vision … yet. But it’s changing. LeanIn.org and McKinsey & Company just released their “2022 Women in the Workforce” report, which showed that “women leaders — already underrepresented in corporate settings — are switching jobs at the highest rate in years, significantly more than men in leadership. They’re ditching their companies for ones with more opportunities, flexibility, and commitment to inclusion.”

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I don’t know about you, but I didn’t need this report to tell me what I’ve seen for decades — women in corporate America, including Biglaw, are fed up operating in an entrenched and broken system that has been built by white men. The McKinsey report has the data to back this up.

So, what are we going to do about it?

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The McKinsey report includes an excellent roadmap of what companies can do to combat this problem. I want to focus on what you can do to create exactly the life you desire and deserve.

Based on my experience working in Biglaw and coaching women executives, we have three options. First, do nothing. Second, stay and change the DNA of the organization. Or, third, leave and create our own business that leverages, values, promotes, and utilizes the strengths of women.

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Maintain The Status Quo

For generations, women have been working in accordance with other peoples’ expectations of how they should behave — and by that I mean white men. Here’s what we have to show for it: Women are 32% more likely to experience burnout compared to men and twice as likely to be diagnosed with depression. The leading cause of death for women is heart disease, 45% of women aged 20 and over have hypertension, and 41% are obese. And despite making up 45% of entering associate ranks, women only comprise 18% to 31% of partnership roles.

Anecdotally, here’s what I hear from my clients.

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“I’ve lost my joy.”
“My health is suffering.”
“The money isn’t worth it.”
“I’m falling deeper into the crevices, and I can’t pull myself out.”
“I don’t have the same level of ambition as I did early in my career, and I hate myself for it.”
“I can’t ‘cut it’ and feel like a failure.”
“I’m ashamed.”

If we do nothing, at best, many of us are in a state of languishing, where we aren’t depressed but we’re not flourishing either. At worst, we are killing ourselves physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

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Change The DNA

With the accelerated flight of women from traditional corporate settings and Gen Z’s refusal to participate in toxic and dysfunctional cultures, now is the time to influence real change within our current organizations.

Here are three ways we can do this.

Practice Conscious Leadership. Conscious leadership first involves guiding others with full awareness of self. It includes promoting innovation and change by having a deep understanding of the ecosystem and individuals within that system. It’s an inclusive focused strategy versus an ego-centered approach. Avoid self-judgment. Show courageous decision-making. Use intuition and logic. Empower your team. Practice active listening. 

Advocate for Fierce Congruence. One reason women lawyers are suffering is because they’ve moved so far away from what’s important to them. When we feel the pressure of things we have to do or act out of fear, our brain biology changes and stress hormones are released. The model of congruent leadership is one where the “activities, actions, and deeds of the leader are matched by and driven by a leader’s values and beliefs.” This type of leadership is executed with ease and less stress. Don’t compromise. Consistently act in alignment with your values. Hold others to the same standards as you hold yourself. Be transparent. Model the healthy behaviors.

Show Up in Love. Yep, you read that right. “The key [to] leading with love is to nurture a culture where people feel safe enough to be vulnerable.” This can be difficult in Biglaw, but “research shows that people who work in a culture where they feel free to express affection, tenderness, care, and compassion for one another were more satisfied with their jobs, committed to the organization, and accountable for their performance.” Express kindness, empathy, and genuine appreciation for your colleagues and leaders. Build connections with those who are different from you. Communicate your own fears and failures.

Leave And Create A New Economy

If staying feels too onerous, like an uphill battle that will take generations, then leave and create a business that’s fueled by your values, without having to give up income, ambition, or family relationships.

I know this sounds scary and unrealistic, especially for the typical risk-averse attorney, and there are endless objections. But what’s the price of not taking action?

Here’s how to get started.

Create White Space. Find a space free of noise, distraction, tech, clutter, kids, etc. Sit quietly. Start with 10 minutes every day and work up to an hour or more. Do this regularly. White space allows you to decompress and access your higher cognitive functions, including creativity. During this time, ask yourself: What would be your biggest regret if this were your last day on this planet? What would you stop doing right now? How would you like your life to be different a year from now? What is one step you can take toward that goal?

Believe in the Possible. Attorneys are increasingly creating their own ways of using their degrees. Reach out to them for inspiration and ideas. Do not engage with people who tell you that you cannot do this. Hire a coach who will hold up a mirror to your soul; tell you the truth when you don’t want to hear it but know you need it; keep you accountable; and help you see, realize, and execute the possibility of who you were put on this earth to be.

Take Fast Action. Attorneys are notorious overthinkers, especially when it comes to making radical moves. We already know the answer yet keep churning the question over in our brains. Our logic prevents us from recognizing the truth and doing something about it, and instead we talk ourselves out of what we feel called to do. The antidote to that is to make a move, right now. DON’T THINK. And watch the power of you accelerate exponentially.

Women lawyers are in a pivotal moment of power. What would Biglaw look like if we chose to change the DNA or simply left?

Let’s take inspiration from our corporate counterparts and the Great Break-Up and say, “no, thank you” (or something stronger) to the white-shoe law firm of yore.

It’s time to take back what we’ve allowed others to control. Will you join me?

Julie Bonasso is a Master Certified Coach, lawyer, and former Director of Recruiting and Professional Development. She has 15 years of experience coaching female lawyers, executives, and emerging leaders.

Topics

Biglaw, Julie Bonasso, MothersEsquire, Women's Issues