This, but on four wheels as Lil’ John plays in the background.

A new Tennessee law (which, mind you, is already in the works of being weakened) has made it illegal for open-air vehicles like party buses to allow their riders to bring or be sold alcoholic beverages. This is an understandable blow to party bus companies’ businesses, considering that a major selling point of their model is that they are what would happen if Ms. Frizzle decided to give adults tours of the impact of poison on their own livers. I do think that the efficacy of this law — for as long as it lasts — will depend on the bulwarks baked in to protect against clever legal interpretations. For example, would a topless party bus fixed with a mesh covering still count as an open vehicle? If not, I expect a lot of drunk Tennesseans to marvel at how hot the moon is in fishnets.

An honest question to our readers: has anyone ever actually gone on a party bus, open or otherwise, of their own volition? It always struck me as one of those things you find yourself on because you’re the friend of a girl whose best friend decided to rent a party bus, and you can’t just directly ask the girl’s best friend why they decided to rent this cursed four-wheel tube with blown-out speakers because they (and their soon-to-be husband) have already blacked out after a few too many Bud Lights. I may or may not still need therapy.

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Now I will admit party buses might make sense logistically as the ferryman to and from other bars that minimize drunk driving, but that’s the only fig leaf I’ll be extending. Beyond that, my gut response to a bunch of people drinking openly in a vehicle that is not a convertible — and by this I mean those people riding on those group bicycle-with-table contraptions — is why do you need to be that drunk and loud in traffic? Do you really find joy in blasting Flo Rida’s greatest hits in public? In 2021?

New Nashville Law Banning Alcohol On Open-Air Party Vehicles In Effect [Tennessean]

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Chris Williams became a social media manager and assistant editor for Above the Law in June 2021. Prior to joining the staff, he moonlighted as a minor Memelord™ in the Facebook group Law School Memes for Edgy T14s. Before that, he wrote columns for an online magazine named The Muse Collaborative under the pen name Knehmo. He endured the great state of Missouri long enough to graduate from Washington University in St. Louis School of Law. He is a former boatbuilder who cannot swim, a published author on critical race theory, philosophy, and humor, and has a love for cycling that occasionally annoys his peers. You can reach him by email at [email protected] and by tweet at @WritesForRent.

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Alcohol, Cars, Drinking, Government, Party Bus, Tennessee